been a while...
It has been almost a year since I last wrote a blog entry. I would love to give some really cool explanation, like I started an organic baby food line and became a millionaire, but that would be a lie.
My year has been spent with my little girl. She is now a year and a half old. I really have trouble with that. I swear it feels as though she was just born last week. I am sure I will wake up tomorrow and she will be in college.
Now, let me be the typical gushing mom for a few minutes. My daughter is awesome, whip smart, really funny, and such a pain in the ass. She is really into running, which means that she is also really into falling. Her father and I have gotten used to it, but it did make me really nervous for a while. She loves her kitties, and spends many hours petting them and kissing them. Quite often she says "nai nai" while she pets them. That is her word for nice.
She doesn't say too many words yet. Evangeline prefers to communicate through stares of death, gestures, smiles, hugs, and general attitude. But, she does say several: nanana for banana, nai for nice, uh-oh, ugh-in for again, adin for all done, mama, noar for roar, and uh for up. We are working on it with her. Her pediatrician would like her to have 20 words by her 18 month appt. That is in early March. We don't see that happening, so an EI eval is probably in her future.
In other news, I am looking for a job. I need one, like, yesterday. We have decided to stay on Long Island. There are a lot of jobs available but the qualifications needed for a $14/ hr entry level job are ridiculous. I guess this is what is meant by an employers market. I will find something, I just have to keep plugging away. I have 3 degrees and a variety of work experience, something will come up. It always does.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Thursday, March 8, 2012
4/27/11: worst day of my life (part 2)
Alex and I needed to take a few minutes to clear our heads and come to a decision.
Amniocentisis is a relatively low-risk procedure. That stats range from 1/200 to 1/500 for the risk of a miscarriage. However, those stats would be cold comfort if you are the one to miscarry after an amnio. I can't imagine carrying a baby for almost 5 months and having a test done that you think is in the best interest of your baby, only to miscarry because of that test.
However, we decided that since the baby had 5 soft markers, we didn't really have any option other than having the amnio done. They did the amnio right then and there. It was quite painful, but very quick.
We had the geneticist lay it all out for us. The amnio tests for 98% of known genetic issues. It takes 10 days for the complete results to come in. There is a result called the FSH results that tests for the most common genetic issues and those results come in within 24 hours. The FSH results include trisomy 13, 18, 21, and the major sexual anomolies like Turners and Kleinfelters. We opted to to pay extra to get the FSH results because with both knew that waiting 10 days without hearing anything would be impossible. Also, the doc was primarily concerned with the trisomys, so we would get the results for that right away.
There is also a test called the micro-array which tests for much rare and newer genetic issues. It is not covered by insurance, it is quite expensive, and it has a 15-25% chance of results coming back as unknown. The 'unknown' indicates that there is an issue but the issue has not been identified (keep in mind that genetics is still a new science). We opted to forego the micro-array test.
After the amnio, we went home. We didn't eat, I don't remember talking that much. I do remember staying up most of the night on the couch. It was a stormy night and it calmed me down to watch the rain running down the window panes. I don't know if I believe in God, but that night I made every bargain I could with him. The bargains ranged from very silly trite things to serious things.
I knew that we could handle a child with Down Syndrome. A boy I grew up with had it and we knew he was different, but he was still our friend and we involved him in everything. Granted, our life plans would be altered and our 'normal' would be something very different from most people's 'normal', but we could do it.
What killed me was the thought of the baby having the other issues. Edwards and Patau are really scary syndromes. Was it fair to bring a baby into the world just for it to live in suffering for a few minutes or a few months? That is a question with no right answer. That is a question that must be devastating to have to answer. I think that either way, you must be haunted for the rest of your life.
Alex went to work on 4/28, I called out sick for the remainder of that week because you need 72 hours of bedrest post-amnio. My parents came over to spend the day with me. We didn't really talk too much. We watched the movie 'Salt', I couldn't tell you what it was about, I didn't pay attention.
I cried a lot that day. I knew that we would be getting a phone call with the FSH results sometime that afternoon. I didn't want to get the call, because if I didn't get the call, it meant I would never have to be told that the baby had something wrong with it.
I was hoping that Alex would be home from work before the call came in. He is always home by 3:45. The phone rang at 3. At that time, I was laying in my bed crying while my parents stayed out on the couch. I had asked them to leave me be for a few minutes.
I looked down at the phone and saw that the number was from the high-risk doctor. I answered and the geneticist spoke very quickly. She told me that the FSH results were all normal. I asked her to repeat herself. She did. I remember sobbing while saying "Are you serious?". My parents heard that and came running in. My mom had tears streaming down her face and my dad has his jaw set. Then they saw me beaming from ear to ear. They looked so happy. I thanked the geneticist and got off the phone.
I told my parents that the results were normal and we all hugged and cried happy tears. When Alex came home, we were all sitting on the couch. Alex looked so anxious. I didn't say anything. I just smiled at him, my dad asked if he wanted a beer. Alex looked kind of confused and I told him that we got the call and the FSH came back normal. He looked happier than I had or have ever seen him look. The hope and happiness in that room was intense.
We knew that we still had to wait for the complete results, but we were condfident from the FSH results. Nine days later, the amnio came back normal.
I have done a lot of research since this experience. I still have yet to come across another story where 5 soft markers turned out okay. There is information about 1, 2, even 3 soft markers, but 5 soft markers is a rare occurance.
If anyone reading this has had a bad anatomy scan and wants to talk about it, leave you email address in the comments section.
Amniocentisis is a relatively low-risk procedure. That stats range from 1/200 to 1/500 for the risk of a miscarriage. However, those stats would be cold comfort if you are the one to miscarry after an amnio. I can't imagine carrying a baby for almost 5 months and having a test done that you think is in the best interest of your baby, only to miscarry because of that test.
However, we decided that since the baby had 5 soft markers, we didn't really have any option other than having the amnio done. They did the amnio right then and there. It was quite painful, but very quick.
We had the geneticist lay it all out for us. The amnio tests for 98% of known genetic issues. It takes 10 days for the complete results to come in. There is a result called the FSH results that tests for the most common genetic issues and those results come in within 24 hours. The FSH results include trisomy 13, 18, 21, and the major sexual anomolies like Turners and Kleinfelters. We opted to to pay extra to get the FSH results because with both knew that waiting 10 days without hearing anything would be impossible. Also, the doc was primarily concerned with the trisomys, so we would get the results for that right away.
There is also a test called the micro-array which tests for much rare and newer genetic issues. It is not covered by insurance, it is quite expensive, and it has a 15-25% chance of results coming back as unknown. The 'unknown' indicates that there is an issue but the issue has not been identified (keep in mind that genetics is still a new science). We opted to forego the micro-array test.
After the amnio, we went home. We didn't eat, I don't remember talking that much. I do remember staying up most of the night on the couch. It was a stormy night and it calmed me down to watch the rain running down the window panes. I don't know if I believe in God, but that night I made every bargain I could with him. The bargains ranged from very silly trite things to serious things.
I knew that we could handle a child with Down Syndrome. A boy I grew up with had it and we knew he was different, but he was still our friend and we involved him in everything. Granted, our life plans would be altered and our 'normal' would be something very different from most people's 'normal', but we could do it.
What killed me was the thought of the baby having the other issues. Edwards and Patau are really scary syndromes. Was it fair to bring a baby into the world just for it to live in suffering for a few minutes or a few months? That is a question with no right answer. That is a question that must be devastating to have to answer. I think that either way, you must be haunted for the rest of your life.
Alex went to work on 4/28, I called out sick for the remainder of that week because you need 72 hours of bedrest post-amnio. My parents came over to spend the day with me. We didn't really talk too much. We watched the movie 'Salt', I couldn't tell you what it was about, I didn't pay attention.
I cried a lot that day. I knew that we would be getting a phone call with the FSH results sometime that afternoon. I didn't want to get the call, because if I didn't get the call, it meant I would never have to be told that the baby had something wrong with it.
I was hoping that Alex would be home from work before the call came in. He is always home by 3:45. The phone rang at 3. At that time, I was laying in my bed crying while my parents stayed out on the couch. I had asked them to leave me be for a few minutes.
I looked down at the phone and saw that the number was from the high-risk doctor. I answered and the geneticist spoke very quickly. She told me that the FSH results were all normal. I asked her to repeat herself. She did. I remember sobbing while saying "Are you serious?". My parents heard that and came running in. My mom had tears streaming down her face and my dad has his jaw set. Then they saw me beaming from ear to ear. They looked so happy. I thanked the geneticist and got off the phone.
I told my parents that the results were normal and we all hugged and cried happy tears. When Alex came home, we were all sitting on the couch. Alex looked so anxious. I didn't say anything. I just smiled at him, my dad asked if he wanted a beer. Alex looked kind of confused and I told him that we got the call and the FSH came back normal. He looked happier than I had or have ever seen him look. The hope and happiness in that room was intense.
We knew that we still had to wait for the complete results, but we were condfident from the FSH results. Nine days later, the amnio came back normal.
I have done a lot of research since this experience. I still have yet to come across another story where 5 soft markers turned out okay. There is information about 1, 2, even 3 soft markers, but 5 soft markers is a rare occurance.
If anyone reading this has had a bad anatomy scan and wants to talk about it, leave you email address in the comments section.
Friday, March 2, 2012
4/27/11: worst day of my life (part 1)
I debated whether I should write about this. I opted to for one reason. When Alex and I were dealing with this, all we wanted was hope, another person's story, to know that we were not alone. I spent many hours searching online and the few articles and blogposts I found made the future a very bleak thing.
Alex and I had gone to Charleston, SC for a week and got back on Sunday, 4/24/11. The next day was our scheduled Anatomy Scan. This is an ultrasound that is done around 20 weeks gestation to make sure the baby is measuring properly.
After a completely uneventful 20 weeks of pregnancy, we fully expected an uneventful Anatomy Scan. We were led into the ultrasound room and the tech got to work. We were so excited because we had not seen the baby since I was 8 weeks pregnant. At 8 weeks, the baby looked like a gummy bear. But at 20 weeks, the baby looked like a baby. It was awesome.
After the ultrasound, the doctor came into the room and immediately said that there were some things that the tech saw that concerned her and that we needed to go to a high-risk doctor. I asked what it was the tech saw and my ob replied that there were 'markers'.
Now, I had done my research on Anatomy Scans prior to ours and knew that sometimes things called 'markers' are found on these scans. They are indicators that there may be a problem with the baby.
I asked which markers the tech saw and my ob said that it would be best if I waited to talk to the high-risk doctor. He said that he would arrange an appointment for us and left the room. As soon as he left, the floodgates opened. My husband, my big and strong husband lost it. I told him to go wait in the car and I would make the arrangements with the high-risk doc.
After securing an appointment for 4/27, we went to my parents armed with ultrasound pictures of our baby. We took no joy in these pictures. But we looked at them and studied them and tried to see what the tech saw. Our baby looked perfect to us, but there was obviously something that we were missing, something important. The rest of that day was spent at my parents's house and my in-law's house, telling them that there might be something very wrong with the baby.
The wait until the appointment with the high-risk doctor was awful. I spent hours looking up information online. Every new article and blog that I read made the prognosis seem worse. I did learn some info that was useful. I learned that the most common conditions that are associated with 'markers' are the Trisomys. The most common Trisomys are 13, 18, and 21. They are Down Syndrome, Edwards Sydrome, and Patau Syndrome. I was very familiar with Down Syndrome, but had never heard of the other two. What I learned about them terrified me.
In addition to the Trisomys, there are a slew of rarer conditions that these 'markers' are indicators for. It also seemed that it is quite common to find one 'marker' on Anatomy Scans. The concern comes in when there is two 'markers'. Finding more than 3 'markers' seemed quite rare. My ob did not tell us how many 'markers' our baby had, so I could not do more specific research.
Our appointment was late morning on 4/27. The high-risk doctor was a very nice man and he gave it to us straight. Our baby had 5 'markers'. The news was a slap in the face. I expected to hear 2 'markers', not 5. I had not come across a single article about a baby having 5 'markers'. He said that the 'markers' were:
-a heart without 4 defined chambers
-eyes that were too wide set
-shriveled kidneys
-short femur bones
-fat nuchal fold
He let us absorb what he was saying for a few moments before advising us that there were options. He said that an amnio could test for 98% of known genetic issues. He also advised us that the limit for abortions in New York state was 24 weeks. I remember that as he was telling us about the 24 week limitation, the baby was kicking furiously. It was surreal.
My head was spinning and I had two things to say to the doctor. I first told him that we needed time to consider the amnio, as it has a risk of miscarriage. Secondly, I asked him a question and I told him that I wanted a straight answer. I asked him if he had ever heard of 5 soft markers ever turning out okay. He replied that he was sure that it had happened. I asked if he was assuming or had known it to happen. he said that he had never personally known 5 markers turning out okay.
With very little hope, we walked out into the parking lot to discuss our options.
Alex and I had gone to Charleston, SC for a week and got back on Sunday, 4/24/11. The next day was our scheduled Anatomy Scan. This is an ultrasound that is done around 20 weeks gestation to make sure the baby is measuring properly.
After a completely uneventful 20 weeks of pregnancy, we fully expected an uneventful Anatomy Scan. We were led into the ultrasound room and the tech got to work. We were so excited because we had not seen the baby since I was 8 weeks pregnant. At 8 weeks, the baby looked like a gummy bear. But at 20 weeks, the baby looked like a baby. It was awesome.
After the ultrasound, the doctor came into the room and immediately said that there were some things that the tech saw that concerned her and that we needed to go to a high-risk doctor. I asked what it was the tech saw and my ob replied that there were 'markers'.
Now, I had done my research on Anatomy Scans prior to ours and knew that sometimes things called 'markers' are found on these scans. They are indicators that there may be a problem with the baby.
I asked which markers the tech saw and my ob said that it would be best if I waited to talk to the high-risk doctor. He said that he would arrange an appointment for us and left the room. As soon as he left, the floodgates opened. My husband, my big and strong husband lost it. I told him to go wait in the car and I would make the arrangements with the high-risk doc.
After securing an appointment for 4/27, we went to my parents armed with ultrasound pictures of our baby. We took no joy in these pictures. But we looked at them and studied them and tried to see what the tech saw. Our baby looked perfect to us, but there was obviously something that we were missing, something important. The rest of that day was spent at my parents's house and my in-law's house, telling them that there might be something very wrong with the baby.
The wait until the appointment with the high-risk doctor was awful. I spent hours looking up information online. Every new article and blog that I read made the prognosis seem worse. I did learn some info that was useful. I learned that the most common conditions that are associated with 'markers' are the Trisomys. The most common Trisomys are 13, 18, and 21. They are Down Syndrome, Edwards Sydrome, and Patau Syndrome. I was very familiar with Down Syndrome, but had never heard of the other two. What I learned about them terrified me.
In addition to the Trisomys, there are a slew of rarer conditions that these 'markers' are indicators for. It also seemed that it is quite common to find one 'marker' on Anatomy Scans. The concern comes in when there is two 'markers'. Finding more than 3 'markers' seemed quite rare. My ob did not tell us how many 'markers' our baby had, so I could not do more specific research.
Our appointment was late morning on 4/27. The high-risk doctor was a very nice man and he gave it to us straight. Our baby had 5 'markers'. The news was a slap in the face. I expected to hear 2 'markers', not 5. I had not come across a single article about a baby having 5 'markers'. He said that the 'markers' were:
-a heart without 4 defined chambers
-eyes that were too wide set
-shriveled kidneys
-short femur bones
-fat nuchal fold
He let us absorb what he was saying for a few moments before advising us that there were options. He said that an amnio could test for 98% of known genetic issues. He also advised us that the limit for abortions in New York state was 24 weeks. I remember that as he was telling us about the 24 week limitation, the baby was kicking furiously. It was surreal.
My head was spinning and I had two things to say to the doctor. I first told him that we needed time to consider the amnio, as it has a risk of miscarriage. Secondly, I asked him a question and I told him that I wanted a straight answer. I asked him if he had ever heard of 5 soft markers ever turning out okay. He replied that he was sure that it had happened. I asked if he was assuming or had known it to happen. he said that he had never personally known 5 markers turning out okay.
With very little hope, we walked out into the parking lot to discuss our options.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
a whole new world
We recently started Evangeline on solids. This has proven to be a very interesting endeavor. And by interesting, I mean it pretty much sucks ass.
I make her food as I don't want any chemicals, hormones, preservatives, etc. going into her little body. You would think that Gerber Peaches have pureed peaches and water. You'd be wrong. There are some hard-to-pronounce things in that ingredients list. It is not just the additional ingredients in pre-made baby food I worry about. I also do not want the food I make to be covered in pesticides. Luckily the USDA has a list of fruits/ veggies (which is all Evangeline eats now) that homemade food makers can use as a reference for buying organic. While I would love to buy all organic, it is really expensive, so I stick to buying the following produce items as organic (or will buy them once Evangeline is old enough to eat them):
1) peaches, 2) apples, 3) bell peppers, 4) celery, 5) nectarines, 6) blueberries, 7) strawberries, 8) cherries, 9) kale, 10) potatoes, 11) imported grapes, 12) spinach.
These 11 items consistently have the highest pesticide content as measured by the USDA.
Of course, once Evangeline starts eating dairy and meats, my list of organic-only items will dramatically increase.
So, the way you make food is easy. You wash, peel, steam, and puree. It is done. We bought those ice cube trays with a lid to freeze and store the baby food. Easy peasy.
Here is what is not easy: feeding her the food and dealing with the poop.
Evangeline is 6 months old today, she likes to grab things, hit things away, reach for things that are not close by, and she just loves putting every single thing she can get her hands on in her mouth. So, while I try to feed her, she grabs the spoons and waves it around. This is really cute, unless there is food on the spoon, then it just sucks. Every third, or so, spoonful gets batted away as she brings her hand down to hit the spoon away. Cue the flying pureed squash.
She also likes to reach for the little dish that holds her food. I try to keep it out of her reach, but sometimes I forget. She waits for me to forget and makes a grab for it, sticking her fingers in the bowl and then touching her hair, her clothes, her highchair, my hair, my clothes, the cats, her toys, etc. But, let's just say that I am able to successfully get half of the food into her mouth, there is still the bib to deal with. She loves picking up her bib and sucking on it. But, when it is covered with pureed veggies, her face just becomes a sheen of yams or squash.
In other words, solids are messy business.
Speaking of business, solids make poop and the act of pooping a nightmare. Formula and breastmilk poops are easy. They are really soft and don't smell that bad. Solids poops are pastey and smell awful. But the worst part is the constipation. My God!! Baby girl is having such a tough time with it. She cries in so much pain and Alex and I have to help her pass her poop. I will not get into how that works. Pears and prunes help a lot in that department, but it is heartbreaking to see your baby in pain from constipation. I am really hoping that her digestive system gets used to solid food soon, so she doesn't have to experience too many more bouts of constipation.
I will say that it is really cute to see her trying new foods. Her formula is nas-tay!! So, everytime she experiences a new flavor, you can see her wonder and her shock. We have been videotaping the first time she tries a new food and it is a trip to see her reaction to real flavors. We have tried:
1) Oatmeal- no strong reaction to it
2) Pears- she likes a lot
3) Yams- she eats them, but does not get excited
4) Squash- she loves very much
5) Prunes- seems to like
6) Apples- not a fan...at all
Tomorrow we try carrots.
I make her food as I don't want any chemicals, hormones, preservatives, etc. going into her little body. You would think that Gerber Peaches have pureed peaches and water. You'd be wrong. There are some hard-to-pronounce things in that ingredients list. It is not just the additional ingredients in pre-made baby food I worry about. I also do not want the food I make to be covered in pesticides. Luckily the USDA has a list of fruits/ veggies (which is all Evangeline eats now) that homemade food makers can use as a reference for buying organic. While I would love to buy all organic, it is really expensive, so I stick to buying the following produce items as organic (or will buy them once Evangeline is old enough to eat them):
1) peaches, 2) apples, 3) bell peppers, 4) celery, 5) nectarines, 6) blueberries, 7) strawberries, 8) cherries, 9) kale, 10) potatoes, 11) imported grapes, 12) spinach.
These 11 items consistently have the highest pesticide content as measured by the USDA.
Of course, once Evangeline starts eating dairy and meats, my list of organic-only items will dramatically increase.
So, the way you make food is easy. You wash, peel, steam, and puree. It is done. We bought those ice cube trays with a lid to freeze and store the baby food. Easy peasy.
Here is what is not easy: feeding her the food and dealing with the poop.
Evangeline is 6 months old today, she likes to grab things, hit things away, reach for things that are not close by, and she just loves putting every single thing she can get her hands on in her mouth. So, while I try to feed her, she grabs the spoons and waves it around. This is really cute, unless there is food on the spoon, then it just sucks. Every third, or so, spoonful gets batted away as she brings her hand down to hit the spoon away. Cue the flying pureed squash.
She also likes to reach for the little dish that holds her food. I try to keep it out of her reach, but sometimes I forget. She waits for me to forget and makes a grab for it, sticking her fingers in the bowl and then touching her hair, her clothes, her highchair, my hair, my clothes, the cats, her toys, etc. But, let's just say that I am able to successfully get half of the food into her mouth, there is still the bib to deal with. She loves picking up her bib and sucking on it. But, when it is covered with pureed veggies, her face just becomes a sheen of yams or squash.
In other words, solids are messy business.
Speaking of business, solids make poop and the act of pooping a nightmare. Formula and breastmilk poops are easy. They are really soft and don't smell that bad. Solids poops are pastey and smell awful. But the worst part is the constipation. My God!! Baby girl is having such a tough time with it. She cries in so much pain and Alex and I have to help her pass her poop. I will not get into how that works. Pears and prunes help a lot in that department, but it is heartbreaking to see your baby in pain from constipation. I am really hoping that her digestive system gets used to solid food soon, so she doesn't have to experience too many more bouts of constipation.
I will say that it is really cute to see her trying new foods. Her formula is nas-tay!! So, everytime she experiences a new flavor, you can see her wonder and her shock. We have been videotaping the first time she tries a new food and it is a trip to see her reaction to real flavors. We have tried:
1) Oatmeal- no strong reaction to it
2) Pears- she likes a lot
3) Yams- she eats them, but does not get excited
4) Squash- she loves very much
5) Prunes- seems to like
6) Apples- not a fan...at all
Tomorrow we try carrots.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Torticollis...and baby girl's first crush
Torticollis is a condition that involves the neck muscles. There are several types and several reasons why people get Torticollis. A person can develop Torticollis at any time. Some people are born with it. That type of Torticollis is called Congenital Muscular Torticollis.
This is what Evangeline has. Due to her size in utero, and the fact that I have a really short torso, she was squished up. The working theory is that she spent the third trimester with her head completely bent and that caused trauma to her neck muscle. She was born with her head tilting to one side.
We thought it was so cute that she posed for us *feel free to roll your eyes here* and didn't even know her tilt was a problem until our pediatrician told us that she has this thing called Torticollis. Even knowing that she had this neck thing, we didn't have the luxury to focus on dealing with it because she had more serious and pressing issues that needed to be dealt with.
Once everything else cleared up and we had a happy baby that didn't scream her every waking hour, we could focus on her Torticollis. We had Early Intervention come evaluate her to see if she qualified for P/T because there was some concern that she had and would have future delays in Gross Motor Skills due to her condition. The reason for this concern was those stupid milestones that babies are supposed to achieve each month. I tend to not put much stock in them, as babies don't know when they are supposed to do things and there is such a wide range of age for babies to do these milestones anyway.
Milestones are great for insecure mompetitors, so they can brag about how their 2 month old is "gifted" because they roll at 2 months. Um, not "gifted", just average, sorry.
So, the EI evaluators came and put her through a battery of tests. Ultimately, they determined that she is not delayed and did not qualify for EI services. However, they did confirm a 10-15 degree head tilt and advised us to look into private P/T.
We took their advice and have had two session with a P/T that focuses on babies with Torticollis. The treatment is going to be stretching exercises and P/T for the next 3 months. Once the 3 months have passed, we will evaluate where she is and if P/T is still needed.
Her daily regimen consists of 4 stretches that are designed to stretch out the left side of her neck, where the trauma to her neck muscle occured and to strengthen the right right side of her neck, which is weaker than it should be.
Poor baby girl hates it. Unfortunately, we have to do 4 sets of 4 stretches, 10 reps each set, 20 seconds each rep. It sucks, you can see how uncomfortable she is, but it is helping. We have noticed a definite difference in her head range of motion and in her tilt. That makes her tears bearable. In a few months, her Torticollis will be a thing of the past and she is young enough that she won't remember that the same stretches that hurt her were the reason that her head is on straight.
One of the side effects of Torticollis is plagiocephaly, otherwise known as flat head. Because it is not comfortable for her to put her head in certain positions, she sleeps the same way every night and every nap. that is causing a flat spot on her head. She may need to wear a helmet to correct it. That will be determined at her appointment with the Orthotist on 2/29. I'll let you know how that goes.
Now, something really cute has happened because of the stretches. As I said, she hates the stretches and cries through them. Alex and I had a mission to distract her, to mesmerize her, to (dare I say) make her forget that her muscles were being stretched out.
Thank you Sesame Street! Thank you youtube! We started showing her clips of Sesame Street songs and she quickly developed favorites. Elmo fascinates her and she likes any songs that involve Elmo and celebrity guests singing together. It helps her tolerate the stretches.
There is one Sesame Street guest that she adores above all others. She shakes when he pops up on the computer screen, she kicks her legs and makes cooing noises. She has developed her first crush.
Her crush is Mr. Jason Mraz. Yes, Evangeline loves every note he sings, every twang from his guitar. She will not take her eyes off of him. I am not ashamed to say that I share this crush with her. What can I say, my daughter has good taste.
Just to test it out and make sure that her crush is on him and not the song, I had her watch other youtube videos of his songs and she is in LOVE with him. It is really cute, but I think Alex is already projecting 13 years into the future when she starts getting interested in real boys.
But if Jason Mraz can get her to tolerate her exercises, he will just have to deal with her little crush.
This is what Evangeline has. Due to her size in utero, and the fact that I have a really short torso, she was squished up. The working theory is that she spent the third trimester with her head completely bent and that caused trauma to her neck muscle. She was born with her head tilting to one side.
We thought it was so cute that she posed for us *feel free to roll your eyes here* and didn't even know her tilt was a problem until our pediatrician told us that she has this thing called Torticollis. Even knowing that she had this neck thing, we didn't have the luxury to focus on dealing with it because she had more serious and pressing issues that needed to be dealt with.
Once everything else cleared up and we had a happy baby that didn't scream her every waking hour, we could focus on her Torticollis. We had Early Intervention come evaluate her to see if she qualified for P/T because there was some concern that she had and would have future delays in Gross Motor Skills due to her condition. The reason for this concern was those stupid milestones that babies are supposed to achieve each month. I tend to not put much stock in them, as babies don't know when they are supposed to do things and there is such a wide range of age for babies to do these milestones anyway.
Milestones are great for insecure mompetitors, so they can brag about how their 2 month old is "gifted" because they roll at 2 months. Um, not "gifted", just average, sorry.
So, the EI evaluators came and put her through a battery of tests. Ultimately, they determined that she is not delayed and did not qualify for EI services. However, they did confirm a 10-15 degree head tilt and advised us to look into private P/T.
We took their advice and have had two session with a P/T that focuses on babies with Torticollis. The treatment is going to be stretching exercises and P/T for the next 3 months. Once the 3 months have passed, we will evaluate where she is and if P/T is still needed.
Her daily regimen consists of 4 stretches that are designed to stretch out the left side of her neck, where the trauma to her neck muscle occured and to strengthen the right right side of her neck, which is weaker than it should be.
Poor baby girl hates it. Unfortunately, we have to do 4 sets of 4 stretches, 10 reps each set, 20 seconds each rep. It sucks, you can see how uncomfortable she is, but it is helping. We have noticed a definite difference in her head range of motion and in her tilt. That makes her tears bearable. In a few months, her Torticollis will be a thing of the past and she is young enough that she won't remember that the same stretches that hurt her were the reason that her head is on straight.
One of the side effects of Torticollis is plagiocephaly, otherwise known as flat head. Because it is not comfortable for her to put her head in certain positions, she sleeps the same way every night and every nap. that is causing a flat spot on her head. She may need to wear a helmet to correct it. That will be determined at her appointment with the Orthotist on 2/29. I'll let you know how that goes.
Now, something really cute has happened because of the stretches. As I said, she hates the stretches and cries through them. Alex and I had a mission to distract her, to mesmerize her, to (dare I say) make her forget that her muscles were being stretched out.
Thank you Sesame Street! Thank you youtube! We started showing her clips of Sesame Street songs and she quickly developed favorites. Elmo fascinates her and she likes any songs that involve Elmo and celebrity guests singing together. It helps her tolerate the stretches.
There is one Sesame Street guest that she adores above all others. She shakes when he pops up on the computer screen, she kicks her legs and makes cooing noises. She has developed her first crush.
Her crush is Mr. Jason Mraz. Yes, Evangeline loves every note he sings, every twang from his guitar. She will not take her eyes off of him. I am not ashamed to say that I share this crush with her. What can I say, my daughter has good taste.
Just to test it out and make sure that her crush is on him and not the song, I had her watch other youtube videos of his songs and she is in LOVE with him. It is really cute, but I think Alex is already projecting 13 years into the future when she starts getting interested in real boys.
But if Jason Mraz can get her to tolerate her exercises, he will just have to deal with her little crush.
Monday, February 13, 2012
a true conversation courtesy of the West Indian man that pumps gas
I spent a few hours today at the mechanics. Our Toyota 4Runner needs: a water pump, timing belt, radiator, some hoses and such. To the tune of $1540. That hurts...a lot. Also, I had to wait until Alex got home from work to be able to leave the mechanic. I did have the stroller with me, but I had to take the base of the car seat out of the 4Runner and could not walk home it. So, I had to wait there for Alex. Not the best way to spend an afternoon.
But, I need to relay the conversation that I had in the waiting area. Evangeline and I were playing and she was looking all around with big bright eyes. Now, she was wearing a pink romper that said 'mommy's little girl' and I kept repeating things like 'who is mommy good little girl' and 'what is my baby girl looking at'. I am not one of those moms that gets upset if a stranger calls Evangeline a boy, but c'mon now.
I fully support people's right to cross-dress, but I would never push that my baby.
Getting back to it, we were just minding our own business when I noticed out of the corner of my eye that there was a man looking at us. He was an employee and seemed harmless, his lips curled into that smile that I had never seen before having Evangeline. It was the smile of someone that had experienced sleepless nights and diaper changes and teething. It was the smile of a parent.
He walked over to us and said...something. I couldn't understand him, he had a really strong accent, possibly Jamaican. I said "Sorry?" He repeated himself, okay definitely sounded like a West Indies accent, and he mentioned the baby and the word 'old', so I just decided that he had asked how old the baby was.
"5 and a half months" I replied.
"How can she be 5 and a half months?" he asked.
"Um, she is 5 months and 13 days old, so it is easier to say 5 and a half months." I answered.
"You are wrong, she is not 5 and a half months."
Um, what??
He went on to explain that babies' age should be counted from the moment of conception, so she should be 14.5 months. I thought this was strange, but I smiled and nodded.
We sat in silence for a few minutes and he spoke again.
Him: "Do you have him a bottle?"
Me: "Yes, I have a bottle for her."
Him: "Is it the goat milk?"
Me: "Nope, it is her specialty formula."
Him: " Why is it not goat milk?"
Now, I have known a lot of people with babies, and not a one has given their infant goat milk. It is either breastmilk or formula for the first year. Really, I probably only know a handful of adults that have drank goat milk.
I explained to him that she has a crappy stomach and needs a special formula and can't handle milk proteins. He nodded and went silent again. Shortly after this, a car pulled up to get gas, so the man walked out (it is a full service station).
He walks back in.
Him: "So he has a bad stomach?"
Me: "Yes, she does?"
Him: "The baby is a girl?"
Me: "Yes, she is. her name is Evangeline."
Him: "Angelina? That is pretty."
Me: "Evangeline."
Him: "Evang...that is not a name."
Me: "Well it is her name."
Him "Oh."
He looks at me with squinted eyes.
Him: "I do not like that name, Ruby is a pretty name."
I nodded and did not hide my annoyance. I went back to playing with my daughter and the time flew by.
I saw him one more time before I left. He came back over and said "Good moms give their babies goat milk and name them pretty names. But your baby is fat and healthy, so you must be doing something right."
Gee, um, thanks?
But, I need to relay the conversation that I had in the waiting area. Evangeline and I were playing and she was looking all around with big bright eyes. Now, she was wearing a pink romper that said 'mommy's little girl' and I kept repeating things like 'who is mommy good little girl' and 'what is my baby girl looking at'. I am not one of those moms that gets upset if a stranger calls Evangeline a boy, but c'mon now.
I fully support people's right to cross-dress, but I would never push that my baby.
Getting back to it, we were just minding our own business when I noticed out of the corner of my eye that there was a man looking at us. He was an employee and seemed harmless, his lips curled into that smile that I had never seen before having Evangeline. It was the smile of someone that had experienced sleepless nights and diaper changes and teething. It was the smile of a parent.
He walked over to us and said...something. I couldn't understand him, he had a really strong accent, possibly Jamaican. I said "Sorry?" He repeated himself, okay definitely sounded like a West Indies accent, and he mentioned the baby and the word 'old', so I just decided that he had asked how old the baby was.
"5 and a half months" I replied.
"How can she be 5 and a half months?" he asked.
"Um, she is 5 months and 13 days old, so it is easier to say 5 and a half months." I answered.
"You are wrong, she is not 5 and a half months."
Um, what??
He went on to explain that babies' age should be counted from the moment of conception, so she should be 14.5 months. I thought this was strange, but I smiled and nodded.
We sat in silence for a few minutes and he spoke again.
Him: "Do you have him a bottle?"
Me: "Yes, I have a bottle for her."
Him: "Is it the goat milk?"
Me: "Nope, it is her specialty formula."
Him: " Why is it not goat milk?"
Now, I have known a lot of people with babies, and not a one has given their infant goat milk. It is either breastmilk or formula for the first year. Really, I probably only know a handful of adults that have drank goat milk.
I explained to him that she has a crappy stomach and needs a special formula and can't handle milk proteins. He nodded and went silent again. Shortly after this, a car pulled up to get gas, so the man walked out (it is a full service station).
He walks back in.
Him: "So he has a bad stomach?"
Me: "Yes, she does?"
Him: "The baby is a girl?"
Me: "Yes, she is. her name is Evangeline."
Him: "Angelina? That is pretty."
Me: "Evangeline."
Him: "Evang...that is not a name."
Me: "Well it is her name."
Him "Oh."
He looks at me with squinted eyes.
Him: "I do not like that name, Ruby is a pretty name."
I nodded and did not hide my annoyance. I went back to playing with my daughter and the time flew by.
I saw him one more time before I left. He came back over and said "Good moms give their babies goat milk and name them pretty names. But your baby is fat and healthy, so you must be doing something right."
Gee, um, thanks?
Monday, February 6, 2012
the golden age and tolerance levels
So much happens in such a short time.
When my daughter was a month old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, and sleeping.
When she was 2 months old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, sleeping, and screaming.
When she was 3 months old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, sleeping, screaming, holding her head up, and looking at things.
When she was 4 months old, she spent her time eating, crying a little, sleeping, holding her head up, looking at things, playing in her jumperoo, pooping, smiling, reaching for toys, petting the cats, and trying to hold her bottle.
She is now 5 months and 6 days old. She sits up for a few minutes at a time, She loves grabbing her toes when her legs are in the air. She gets a good grip on her bottle, but hasn't figured out how to get it in her mouth yet. She has gotten really good at picking things up, even very small things. She has 2 teeth. She can stand with very little assistance.
I was aware that the time period from 5-7 months is known aas the golden age of infancy and now I know why. It is the most amazing thing. You can actually see her learning and figuring things out. She notices everything, has developed her own opinions about items she comes in contact with everyday. She has preferred toys, toys she shuns, she likes watching our boy cat better than the girl cat, but she prefers petting the girl cat over the boy cat.
She is changing daily, time is flying by and it makes me a little sad. Before Alex and I know it, she will be graduating from high school and I feel like there is no way to capture every little moment and I worry that I may forget the little things that I love so much. Even though I write down a lot of it, I will forget how I feel during those special moments. It is one thing to read that I loved when she licks my shoulders, it is quite another thing to feel that love when she does it.
On a completely unrelated note, I have to put down in writing what motherhood has done to my tolerance levels. I have a deep well of patience for babies. After dealing with colic, I am fairly confident that my patience for babies is virtually inextinguishable. My tolerance levels for everyone else...not so much.
I am having a much harder time dealing with other's bullshit. I have always been fairly headstrong and I am not shy in stating my opinions. But, I could listen to people prattle on about really silly things without batting an eyelash. I recall, with great clarity, a 4 hour lunch where I had to listen to a former friend talk about how she couldn't understand why she had a rep for being promiscuous while talking about the random guy she had shtooped the night before. I, of course, gave the right sympathizing words to her. "Nobody thinks you are slutty", "You are a single woman that can do what she wants to do", "I totally think that guy from last night will call you".
Now, I would tell that friend that she is a dumbass and needs to close her legs. I just don't have that tolerance for people anymore. People get hung up over the dumbest things, things that are of no actual consequence. Get over it and get over yourself. And if you can't do that, keep that stupid shit to yourself, I don't want to hear it.
When my daughter was a month old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, and sleeping.
When she was 2 months old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, sleeping, and screaming.
When she was 3 months old, she spent her time eating, crying, pooping, puking, sleeping, screaming, holding her head up, and looking at things.
When she was 4 months old, she spent her time eating, crying a little, sleeping, holding her head up, looking at things, playing in her jumperoo, pooping, smiling, reaching for toys, petting the cats, and trying to hold her bottle.
She is now 5 months and 6 days old. She sits up for a few minutes at a time, She loves grabbing her toes when her legs are in the air. She gets a good grip on her bottle, but hasn't figured out how to get it in her mouth yet. She has gotten really good at picking things up, even very small things. She has 2 teeth. She can stand with very little assistance.
I was aware that the time period from 5-7 months is known aas the golden age of infancy and now I know why. It is the most amazing thing. You can actually see her learning and figuring things out. She notices everything, has developed her own opinions about items she comes in contact with everyday. She has preferred toys, toys she shuns, she likes watching our boy cat better than the girl cat, but she prefers petting the girl cat over the boy cat.
She is changing daily, time is flying by and it makes me a little sad. Before Alex and I know it, she will be graduating from high school and I feel like there is no way to capture every little moment and I worry that I may forget the little things that I love so much. Even though I write down a lot of it, I will forget how I feel during those special moments. It is one thing to read that I loved when she licks my shoulders, it is quite another thing to feel that love when she does it.
On a completely unrelated note, I have to put down in writing what motherhood has done to my tolerance levels. I have a deep well of patience for babies. After dealing with colic, I am fairly confident that my patience for babies is virtually inextinguishable. My tolerance levels for everyone else...not so much.
I am having a much harder time dealing with other's bullshit. I have always been fairly headstrong and I am not shy in stating my opinions. But, I could listen to people prattle on about really silly things without batting an eyelash. I recall, with great clarity, a 4 hour lunch where I had to listen to a former friend talk about how she couldn't understand why she had a rep for being promiscuous while talking about the random guy she had shtooped the night before. I, of course, gave the right sympathizing words to her. "Nobody thinks you are slutty", "You are a single woman that can do what she wants to do", "I totally think that guy from last night will call you".
Now, I would tell that friend that she is a dumbass and needs to close her legs. I just don't have that tolerance for people anymore. People get hung up over the dumbest things, things that are of no actual consequence. Get over it and get over yourself. And if you can't do that, keep that stupid shit to yourself, I don't want to hear it.
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