I hate the cold weather.
The dead leaves that litter the ground make me sad. The bare branches are downright depressing. While I do love the first snowfall, particularly if it happens at night, I would trade the first snow for a longer summer any day of the week.
Maybe I need to learn how to ski. Or snowboard. Or, just accept the fact that I will never really like the cold weather.
But I do love the cold weather veggies.
Veggies make me happy. I don't eat them for the health benefits, that is just a bonus. I eat them because they are so damn good. Tomatoes, brussel sprouts, asparagus, zuchinni...good stuff. Veggies are versatile and, if you buy them in season, they are cheap. Usually, there is at least one choice of organic veggie on sale each week. If possible, buy organic, they are better for you and I happen to think that they taste a little better. But, examine them carefully. A lot of times, the markets will put the organic produce for sale because they are not in the best shape.
Winter veggies are no exception to this. There is less variety in the colder months, but there is still an endless assortment of recipes that can be made with them. Roots veggies are readily available and lend themselves to soups, stews, tarts, and a ton of side dishes. My husband and I are huge fans of squash and I made a recipe that can be altered to fit several diet types. The ingredients for this soup are cheap and you may already have most of them on hand.
Butternut squash soup
4 cups butternut squash, cut into small cubes
12 ounzes reduced sodium chicken stock (or veggie stock for vegan recipe)
1/2 cup milk (or coconut milk for vegan recipe)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon all spice
1/4 cup packed dark brown sugar
Combine all in a large saucepan and cook, covered, on medium heat until the squash is mushy. Transfer the soup to a blender and blend until a smooth puree. Return to saucepan, reduce heat to med-low and cook for another 10 minutes, or until the soup has thickened slightly. Enjoy.
Notes:
1) The spices are all to taste. Play with them and find out what you like.
2) Most people prefer a slightly sweeter soup, but I do not. If you like things a little sweeter, add a little more brown sugar, but taste it first.
3) For a really decadent soup, you can replace the milk with half and half.
4) If you cannot find reduced sodium chicken stock, purchase regular, but do not add any salt to the soup. Once the soup is pureed, taste it and add more if needed.
Hope you guys like this soup as much as we do.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
glad we rent
I am obsessed with looking at homes for sale. Obsessed.
My husband and I are planning on relocating to Charleston, SC in the near future, so I spend a lot of time looking at homes for sale in the Charleston area. The difference in price between homes down there and homes on Long Island is staggering. I am currently in love with a 4 bedroom home, new construction, 2700 square feet, 3 full baths, hardwood floors, granite countertops, full deck, pool, in Summerville, SC that is listed at $210,000. The property taxes are $1200 a year. Are you fu@#ing kidding me?
I used to live in a town called Long Beach. Kick ass town. Great place if you are single, you surf, and you like to partake in libations. There was this super cute bungalow down the street from my first apartment in Long Beach. It was a 4 room place: 1 bedroom, 1 kitchen, 1 bathroom, and 1 living room. It was listed at $469,000 and the property taxes were $8900 a year. And. It. Sold. At that price! Can you imagine?
Granted, what I just gave was an extreme, albiet truthful, comparison. But, you get the picture. You do make significantly less money down south, but if you add it all up, you are still much better off financially down there.
Oh, and the weather kicks toukas.
But, a house is still a ways away for us. So, we rent. Sometimes, my husband and I get a little sad. We get that longing to own something, to have a yard that we can play with our daughter in. However, in the current market, we are pretty happy to be renters.
A lot of our friends purchsed their homes right before the housing market crashed. Now they owe more on their mortgages than their homes are worth. Now, if you were planning on hanging on to a new home for a long time, this might not be such a huge problem because, eventually,the market will rebound. But, most couples buying their first home, buy something called a starter home with the idea of donig some improvements and selling it in a few years. Those people are S.O.L. for the time being. In order to not take a huge loss, people have to hang on to homes for much longer than they had planned. Not fun.
Also, property taxes are on the rise. Always on the rise. It's getting to the point where sometimes the property tax is just a little less than the mortgage payment.
Utilities is another reason that renting is a good move for us. Our awesome landlords do not require us to pay utilities. Water, heat, electric, internet, cable, all included in our rent. Our last place has the same monthly rent, but we had to pay all utilities and that would be an extra $300 a month. And, if we were paying utilities during last winter or this past summer, it would have wound up being more than $300 a month. We get it all included and get to control the thermostat for the entire house to boot. Not bad for renting only the top floor of a house.
Maintenance. Haha. If the boiler breaks, we don't pay for it. If there are termites, we don't have to deal with it. We don't have to mow, or rake, or shovel. Instead, the landlord's nice teenage son does it all for us. It was nice last year. This year, it will be a huge bonus as I lug my daughter to the car after a snowstorm.
Finally, we are not locked into anything. We don't have a lease. But, for arguments sake, let's assume that we do. Breaking a lease is not in the same category as defaulting on a home loan. Yes, you may get a landlord that takes you to court for breaking the lease. Most landlords seem to settle as court is a pain in the ass. But if you default on a home loan, you are screwed. The house goes into foreclosure and you become a persona non grata in the world of home loans.
So, taken the fact that we are now one income, we feel great about being renters. For now, we will live in our awesome and cheap apartment, not having to do a damn thing for the house.
You know, it is a little chilly in here. I think I will turn up the heat.
My husband and I are planning on relocating to Charleston, SC in the near future, so I spend a lot of time looking at homes for sale in the Charleston area. The difference in price between homes down there and homes on Long Island is staggering. I am currently in love with a 4 bedroom home, new construction, 2700 square feet, 3 full baths, hardwood floors, granite countertops, full deck, pool, in Summerville, SC that is listed at $210,000. The property taxes are $1200 a year. Are you fu@#ing kidding me?
I used to live in a town called Long Beach. Kick ass town. Great place if you are single, you surf, and you like to partake in libations. There was this super cute bungalow down the street from my first apartment in Long Beach. It was a 4 room place: 1 bedroom, 1 kitchen, 1 bathroom, and 1 living room. It was listed at $469,000 and the property taxes were $8900 a year. And. It. Sold. At that price! Can you imagine?
Granted, what I just gave was an extreme, albiet truthful, comparison. But, you get the picture. You do make significantly less money down south, but if you add it all up, you are still much better off financially down there.
Oh, and the weather kicks toukas.
But, a house is still a ways away for us. So, we rent. Sometimes, my husband and I get a little sad. We get that longing to own something, to have a yard that we can play with our daughter in. However, in the current market, we are pretty happy to be renters.
A lot of our friends purchsed their homes right before the housing market crashed. Now they owe more on their mortgages than their homes are worth. Now, if you were planning on hanging on to a new home for a long time, this might not be such a huge problem because, eventually,the market will rebound. But, most couples buying their first home, buy something called a starter home with the idea of donig some improvements and selling it in a few years. Those people are S.O.L. for the time being. In order to not take a huge loss, people have to hang on to homes for much longer than they had planned. Not fun.
Also, property taxes are on the rise. Always on the rise. It's getting to the point where sometimes the property tax is just a little less than the mortgage payment.
Utilities is another reason that renting is a good move for us. Our awesome landlords do not require us to pay utilities. Water, heat, electric, internet, cable, all included in our rent. Our last place has the same monthly rent, but we had to pay all utilities and that would be an extra $300 a month. And, if we were paying utilities during last winter or this past summer, it would have wound up being more than $300 a month. We get it all included and get to control the thermostat for the entire house to boot. Not bad for renting only the top floor of a house.
Maintenance. Haha. If the boiler breaks, we don't pay for it. If there are termites, we don't have to deal with it. We don't have to mow, or rake, or shovel. Instead, the landlord's nice teenage son does it all for us. It was nice last year. This year, it will be a huge bonus as I lug my daughter to the car after a snowstorm.
Finally, we are not locked into anything. We don't have a lease. But, for arguments sake, let's assume that we do. Breaking a lease is not in the same category as defaulting on a home loan. Yes, you may get a landlord that takes you to court for breaking the lease. Most landlords seem to settle as court is a pain in the ass. But if you default on a home loan, you are screwed. The house goes into foreclosure and you become a persona non grata in the world of home loans.
So, taken the fact that we are now one income, we feel great about being renters. For now, we will live in our awesome and cheap apartment, not having to do a damn thing for the house.
You know, it is a little chilly in here. I think I will turn up the heat.
Monday, November 21, 2011
colic sucks
Let me start by describing what colic is not. It is not a baby that cries for an hour and stops and goes to sleep. It is not a baby that cries when he or she is hungry. It is really hard to not punch someone in the face when you tell them about your baby's extreme colic and they respond by saying that they know how you feel because their little angel took an hour to fall asleep. Any parent who has a child that has colic would kill if their child was just a fussy baby.
Colic is described in rules of 3:
1) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours
2) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours 3 or more times a week
3) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours 3 or more times a week for 3 or more weeks.
I am assuming that is the lowest level of colic there is because I would love for Evangeline to be that kind of colic.
Instead, we have a baby that cries/ screams pretty much every hour she is awake. This is an everyday thing and has been going on for two months now.
Colic is supposed to improve starting after 6-8 weeks of age. 'Most' babies get over their colic between 3-4 months. We are closing in on the 3 month mark and keeping our fingers crossed.
The reason colic sucks has very little to do with the baby. Babies that have colic have no residual issues from their colic. You don't see 13 year olds screaming for 5-7 hours a day for no reason. Babies do outgrow it. The real impact of colic is seen in the parents that have to deal with it.
Here is why colic sucks:
1) It makes you feel like a bad parent. Surely, the baby must by crying for a reason. What kind of parent does not know how to calm down their own child? What kind of parent cannot find the reason why their baby is screaming? There is very little that can make a person feel more inadequate than not being able to soothe your screaming baby.
2) It does a number on the parent's nerves and relationship. Babies scream because they need _______. They have no other forms of communication so evolution made their screams such that they would be heard. Babies' screams are jarring and upsetting and causes a very high level of stress. It also causes the parents to snap at each other, blame each other, curse at each other. We can't take out frustrations out on the baby, obviously; so, we take it out on each other. Just for shits and giggles...you want to test your marriage, agree to watch a baby with colic for one weekend.
3) It is very isolating. The first few weeks of parenthood, you are getting used to the exhaustion that comes with it and can't fathom the idea of socializing much. After 2-3 weeks, you kind of get used to it and are ready to rejoin the world of the living. Granted, you are not going to be going out to the bars every weekend, but you can certainly enjoy a nice night at a friend's house drinking a bottle of wine. Wrong. Colic prevents that. You can't bring the baby anywhere. Colic is not something that you subject others to, it is extremely upsetting. You can't have people over for the same reason. Also, it is impossible to have a simple conversation when a baby is screaming the entire time.
It also prevents things as simple as phone calls. Colic tends to be worse in the early to late evening hours. This is when people tend to call their friends and family as everyone is arriving home from work. Screaming children are not conducive to being able to talk on the phone.
So, please have patience if a friend or a family member has a colic baby. It is not that they don't want to talk or see you, they very likely are desperate to talk and see you, it is just that colic makes a social life an impossible task.
Colic sucks, it really does.
Colic is described in rules of 3:
1) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours
2) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours 3 or more times a week
3) Baby cries without obvious reason more than 3 hours 3 or more times a week for 3 or more weeks.
I am assuming that is the lowest level of colic there is because I would love for Evangeline to be that kind of colic.
Instead, we have a baby that cries/ screams pretty much every hour she is awake. This is an everyday thing and has been going on for two months now.
Colic is supposed to improve starting after 6-8 weeks of age. 'Most' babies get over their colic between 3-4 months. We are closing in on the 3 month mark and keeping our fingers crossed.
The reason colic sucks has very little to do with the baby. Babies that have colic have no residual issues from their colic. You don't see 13 year olds screaming for 5-7 hours a day for no reason. Babies do outgrow it. The real impact of colic is seen in the parents that have to deal with it.
Here is why colic sucks:
1) It makes you feel like a bad parent. Surely, the baby must by crying for a reason. What kind of parent does not know how to calm down their own child? What kind of parent cannot find the reason why their baby is screaming? There is very little that can make a person feel more inadequate than not being able to soothe your screaming baby.
2) It does a number on the parent's nerves and relationship. Babies scream because they need _______. They have no other forms of communication so evolution made their screams such that they would be heard. Babies' screams are jarring and upsetting and causes a very high level of stress. It also causes the parents to snap at each other, blame each other, curse at each other. We can't take out frustrations out on the baby, obviously; so, we take it out on each other. Just for shits and giggles...you want to test your marriage, agree to watch a baby with colic for one weekend.
3) It is very isolating. The first few weeks of parenthood, you are getting used to the exhaustion that comes with it and can't fathom the idea of socializing much. After 2-3 weeks, you kind of get used to it and are ready to rejoin the world of the living. Granted, you are not going to be going out to the bars every weekend, but you can certainly enjoy a nice night at a friend's house drinking a bottle of wine. Wrong. Colic prevents that. You can't bring the baby anywhere. Colic is not something that you subject others to, it is extremely upsetting. You can't have people over for the same reason. Also, it is impossible to have a simple conversation when a baby is screaming the entire time.
It also prevents things as simple as phone calls. Colic tends to be worse in the early to late evening hours. This is when people tend to call their friends and family as everyone is arriving home from work. Screaming children are not conducive to being able to talk on the phone.
So, please have patience if a friend or a family member has a colic baby. It is not that they don't want to talk or see you, they very likely are desperate to talk and see you, it is just that colic makes a social life an impossible task.
Colic sucks, it really does.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
babies are good for your arms (and your abs, your butt, and your thighs)
My daughter was 10lbs 9ozs at birth. To give you an idea of just how large that is for a baby, I give you this. Ultrasound machines give baby measurements, in utero, based on how large the average baby should be every week. Most ultrasound machines are designed to measure up to 42 weeks gestation. When I was 38 weeks pregnant, I had an ultrasound. Evangeline already measured off the charts. Literally, her belly was so big that it didn't fit on the screen. Statistically, less than 1% of babies are born at her size. She could have been full term twins. If you have ever seen a woman pregnant with full term twins (not that common as most women that have twins give birth early), you can guess what my belly looked like.
So it should come as no surprise that, at 2.5 months, she is already 13 lbs and growing. I have decided to use that to my advantage for as long as I can. Eventually, she will be too big for me to use her as exercise, so I need to get it in quick.
As my gym membership has become a victim of our bare-bones budget, I have to get creative with my fitness. I gained 40 lbs during pregnancy and have 8 more to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. But, I don't want to stop there. It used to be really easy to go to the gym and get in a workout. Now, even if we could afford the gym, who the hell has the time? I am lucky if I have time to brush my hair everyday.
So combining playtime with the baby and getting in a workout...bazinga.
My new routine consists of Evi armlifts, Evi lunges, Evi buttlifts, and Evi ab twists. The armlifts are really similar to the type of routine that I would do with free weights. Oh, I didn't squeal and make funny faces when I did free weights, but Evangeline seems to really like squeals and weird faces.
For the lunges, I put Evangeline in my Ergo carrier and go to town. I do brace myself against the wall for extra support. Her safety is my number one.
The buttlifts are a little complicated. I lay flat on the ground and pull my knees up. I place her back against my thighs. Unlike traditional buttlifts where you lay your arms flat on the ground for balance, I hold her in place in my lap. Then, I thrust upwards.
Evi abtwists are also done using the Ergo. Once she is strapped in, I spread my legs so they are2-3 feet apart and squat down a little. Then I tighten my ab muscles (the pitifull and wrecked things they have become) and slowly twist from side to side.
Keep in my mind that playtime with Evangeline is my priority so I am talking with her, making squeals, and exaggerated moments the entire time. I would much rather have a happy baby than a good body; but, if I can combine playtime with activities that are beneficial to my waistline...bonus.
The 3rd best thing about these activities is that they are free. Baby, budget, and body friendly.
My guess is that if I combine these activities with walking her, I could be ready for next summer 20 lbs lower than I was when I got pregnant. That would make me a very happy girl. And, I get to play with my daughter and get her out for daily walks. Of course, in a few short weeks, we are going to become mall-walkers because NY winters are not known for being baby-friendly. I am just going to have to remember to leave my ATM card and credit card at home, or being a mall-walker could wind up being quite expensive.
So it should come as no surprise that, at 2.5 months, she is already 13 lbs and growing. I have decided to use that to my advantage for as long as I can. Eventually, she will be too big for me to use her as exercise, so I need to get it in quick.
As my gym membership has become a victim of our bare-bones budget, I have to get creative with my fitness. I gained 40 lbs during pregnancy and have 8 more to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. But, I don't want to stop there. It used to be really easy to go to the gym and get in a workout. Now, even if we could afford the gym, who the hell has the time? I am lucky if I have time to brush my hair everyday.
So combining playtime with the baby and getting in a workout...bazinga.
My new routine consists of Evi armlifts, Evi lunges, Evi buttlifts, and Evi ab twists. The armlifts are really similar to the type of routine that I would do with free weights. Oh, I didn't squeal and make funny faces when I did free weights, but Evangeline seems to really like squeals and weird faces.
For the lunges, I put Evangeline in my Ergo carrier and go to town. I do brace myself against the wall for extra support. Her safety is my number one.
The buttlifts are a little complicated. I lay flat on the ground and pull my knees up. I place her back against my thighs. Unlike traditional buttlifts where you lay your arms flat on the ground for balance, I hold her in place in my lap. Then, I thrust upwards.
Evi abtwists are also done using the Ergo. Once she is strapped in, I spread my legs so they are2-3 feet apart and squat down a little. Then I tighten my ab muscles (the pitifull and wrecked things they have become) and slowly twist from side to side.
Keep in my mind that playtime with Evangeline is my priority so I am talking with her, making squeals, and exaggerated moments the entire time. I would much rather have a happy baby than a good body; but, if I can combine playtime with activities that are beneficial to my waistline...bonus.
The 3rd best thing about these activities is that they are free. Baby, budget, and body friendly.
My guess is that if I combine these activities with walking her, I could be ready for next summer 20 lbs lower than I was when I got pregnant. That would make me a very happy girl. And, I get to play with my daughter and get her out for daily walks. Of course, in a few short weeks, we are going to become mall-walkers because NY winters are not known for being baby-friendly. I am just going to have to remember to leave my ATM card and credit card at home, or being a mall-walker could wind up being quite expensive.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
can't look back now
The letter is in the mail. Tomorrow or the day after, my boss will recieve my letter of resignation. Immediately after putting the letter in the mailbox, a feeling of horror came over me. What did I do? I just quit a teaching job when it is impossible to get a teaching job (at least in NY). I just gave up a really nice salary. I am not tenured so I could not just extend my leave and take a year sabbatical. It was all or nothing. What the hell was I thinking?
Once that momentary panic subsided, I felt relief. I was so miserable in that job for so long. Now, I found the most important reason there is to quit a job. I am still nervous and I feel slightly unprepared for the challenges that living on one income will throw our way. But, I feel confident that we can weather the storm.
On a side note, today marks the longest stretch of time I have spent alone with my daughter. My husband usually gets home around 3:45 and we share baby duty until bedtime. During the night, my husband will get up for one feeding and I take care of the rest. However, my husband's school had parent/ teacher conferences tonight and he will not be home until 8:30 pm.
For most moms, this would only present a slight challenge. But my daughter is a special case. She has severe GERD and feeding her is a battle that takes up the overwhelming majority of my day. Sometimes a single 5 oz bottle will take 2 hours to get down her. She also has Torticollis and requires daily stretches that she despises. Oh, she also has a wicked case of colic. We are talking 5-7 hours of screaming, not crying, per day. Some days are better than others. Today was not such a day.
For days like this, Xanax is my best friend.
But even on her worst day, my daughter is amazing and I wouldn't trade her in for the quietest baby, the easiest feeder, the happiest and squishiest baby. She may be a pain in the butt, but she is my pain in the butt and I am so proud to be her mother.
Once that momentary panic subsided, I felt relief. I was so miserable in that job for so long. Now, I found the most important reason there is to quit a job. I am still nervous and I feel slightly unprepared for the challenges that living on one income will throw our way. But, I feel confident that we can weather the storm.
On a side note, today marks the longest stretch of time I have spent alone with my daughter. My husband usually gets home around 3:45 and we share baby duty until bedtime. During the night, my husband will get up for one feeding and I take care of the rest. However, my husband's school had parent/ teacher conferences tonight and he will not be home until 8:30 pm.
For most moms, this would only present a slight challenge. But my daughter is a special case. She has severe GERD and feeding her is a battle that takes up the overwhelming majority of my day. Sometimes a single 5 oz bottle will take 2 hours to get down her. She also has Torticollis and requires daily stretches that she despises. Oh, she also has a wicked case of colic. We are talking 5-7 hours of screaming, not crying, per day. Some days are better than others. Today was not such a day.
For days like this, Xanax is my best friend.
But even on her worst day, my daughter is amazing and I wouldn't trade her in for the quietest baby, the easiest feeder, the happiest and squishiest baby. She may be a pain in the butt, but she is my pain in the butt and I am so proud to be her mother.
Monday, November 14, 2011
the big decision has been made
Today is the first day of my life as a stay at home mom. My daughter Evangeline was born on August 30, 2011 and I have been out on maternity leave since. After doing some numbers crunching, my husband and I decided that it was not really worth it for me to go back towork. All I need to do is put my letter of resignation in the mail tomorrow and it is done.
I am excited. I relish the thought of being the person to see my daughter's first steps and hear her say 'dada'.
Daycare has become an unfortunate necessity for so many and that was our plan. It is going to be unbelievably hard to make it on one salary, but I am determined to hustle to make it work. Tutoring, check; babysitting, check; part time evening work, check. I have an A.A, a B.A., and an M.S. and I will take any part time job to make this work.
I am scared. There is the lingering doubt that money will become too tight, that a bill will come up that we can't pay, that the fights over money will become too nasty. But, we discussed this. We have a sizeable savings that is for a down payment for a home. If we have to dip into that, we will. We hope to not have to, but we will if the need arises.
So, this is my little blog. I hope to learn all about the art of doing things on the cheap. Sundays are now going to be for clipping coupons and checking out sales, our clothes are going to have to last us. See that fancy beer my baby is holding? That will be replaced with Budweiser. Generic all the way, baby. If I learn any cool money saving tips, I will pass it on. If I create yummy recipes using cheapo ingredients, I will pass it on.
You might read me bitching from time to time. A) I like to bitch about things B) I am still trying to figure it all out.
But at the end of the day, Evangeline is what matters and it is more important to us that one of us spends her first year of life with her than the rather extravagent way we have been living.
-Marissa
I am excited. I relish the thought of being the person to see my daughter's first steps and hear her say 'dada'.
Daycare has become an unfortunate necessity for so many and that was our plan. It is going to be unbelievably hard to make it on one salary, but I am determined to hustle to make it work. Tutoring, check; babysitting, check; part time evening work, check. I have an A.A, a B.A., and an M.S. and I will take any part time job to make this work.
I am scared. There is the lingering doubt that money will become too tight, that a bill will come up that we can't pay, that the fights over money will become too nasty. But, we discussed this. We have a sizeable savings that is for a down payment for a home. If we have to dip into that, we will. We hope to not have to, but we will if the need arises.
So, this is my little blog. I hope to learn all about the art of doing things on the cheap. Sundays are now going to be for clipping coupons and checking out sales, our clothes are going to have to last us. See that fancy beer my baby is holding? That will be replaced with Budweiser. Generic all the way, baby. If I learn any cool money saving tips, I will pass it on. If I create yummy recipes using cheapo ingredients, I will pass it on.
You might read me bitching from time to time. A) I like to bitch about things B) I am still trying to figure it all out.
But at the end of the day, Evangeline is what matters and it is more important to us that one of us spends her first year of life with her than the rather extravagent way we have been living.
-Marissa
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